Does Every Cloud Have A Silver Lining?

     After taking this picture over the magnificent Oregon coast, I noticed the silver lining around the clouds, reminding me of the phrase "Every cloud has a silver lining."  "Does it?" I asked myself, leading me to examine the quote more closely.

     At first I thought the words were from a proverb in the Bible but it wasn't found there so as I went along, a writing by John Milton in 1634, and another by Mrs. S. Hall in 1840 were found.  (You can look these up if you want)  Both authors said the same thing in different ways:

     "...I did not err; there does a sable cloud turn forth her silver lining on the night..."   - Milton   (near-forgotten language!!)

     There's a silver lining to every cloud that sails about heaven if we could only see it."   - Hall   (more modern!!)

     What both authors express is how difficult times lead to better days.  But do they?  In contrast, there is a verse in the Bible which reads: "And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose."  - Romans 8:28

     "All things" must include difficult things too; God's purpose is always good; the verse does not say according to MY purpose.  Just because God is working on, in, and through struggles does not automatically mean "everything's coming up roses."  Sometimes the opposite happens.  And, the Bible verse is directed toward those who love God while the silver lining metaphor is for anyone.  

     When going through a struggle, seeing a silver lining anywhere near the cloud feels unlikely; impossible, even - often it looks only gray and dreary.  But God.  He is a God of possibilities.  He can and does work through the human experiences of suffering.
     Go back to the clouds and silver lining.  Some days are dark, and not facing the day can seem like a good option.  I had such a day like this back on February 13th, 2020.  I know this because I've kept a journal for 40 years, and sometimes going back to what I've written is funny, strange, or revealing.  I'm not sure what was going on but this is what I wrote:

        "Saturday now.  I feel depressed, sad, and alone.  6:30 am.  Pip is awake; I've been awake since 4am.  Headache.  Cold rain.  Can't sleep.  Decided to get up.  I have a life hangover.  Life.  Mine."

         (Does this sound dreary or what?  Not so obvious what is going on but I continue):

         "I'm watching a movie about other people.  Sometimes it makes me happy to watch a drama of others' problems.  This one is called "BEST MAN DOWN."  There are some people in the movie who are not very nice.  (In real life too.)  Some are depressed.  Others are in denial or pretend to be who they are not."

          "In this movie, a man dies - the best man - I like him and it is sad how he is suddenly gone.  He was fun and likeable.  Then there's a girl - the dead man's girl - and she is sad.  She can't seem to show it so hides it.  With her I can relate."

          "I'm trying to adjust myself to 'what is' today.  Adjust.  I keep on wanting something different and am unable to make it happen.  It is cyclic.  Life is cyclic.  No matter what is, or is not going on, God's favor is a part of my life.  (Favor is my word for the year.)  God is for me, and when others don't treat me like I want/need to be treated, I have to move beyond them, adjust my day, and find a new strategy."

                             IT'S A START.

          "I'm 63.  I might not have much time.  We never really know.  Because of that truth, I will try to live through this day only, and not tackle all my problems at once.  I can do something for 12 hours that would appall me if I believed I had to keep it up for a lifetime."  

          "I will also be as agreeable as I can, and I won't find fault with anything, nor try to improve anybody but myself.  That's the hardest part...  In my life...  When I feel depressed, sad, and alone.  It's not easy."

          "The day went on.  It improved.  It improved because I was honest with how I felt about life lately.  I know I envy others sometimes, and that means I am being my overly self-focused self who wants to be sad for awhile, and who doesn't stay that way for long since it isn't my true nature to stay sad.  I am a resolver."

           "James brought me a balloon!  I never get a balloon, and like any child, I loved getting one.  Today I will put it in our room."

           "Like I said, Saturday went on.  It was good.  I baked heart-shaped sugar cookies with butter frosting, sprinkled with magic red sand and dots.  So delicious!  I cooked dinner but don't remember what it was, made phone calls, thought about others' lives beyond myself, cleaned up, then watched the end of a movie about autism."

        That's the end of my journal for February 13th, 2020.  I noticed how I did not reveal the exact reason why I was having a down day but I hinted at the unkindness of others, and with my difficult self who is not content for long.  I gave myself a pep talk, and made conscious efforts to cheer myself up.  Getting a balloon made me feel loved, important.  The silver lining is how I chose to respond to my "depressed Saturday," something anyone can do.   

           

            

           

LIFE OFFERS STORMS; GOD OFFERS LIFE

WHILE THE STORM RAGES, I AM CHANGED.

    Sometimes we give up all hope; the sun and stars seem dim, the moon non-existent.  Darkness.  We feel as if we will not survive the current crisis.

     But God.  He says, "Do not be afraid."  He would not say that, and it would not appear so often throughout the Bible, particularly in Psalms, if we were not fearful of the unknown, the uncertainty, the storm, and the wreck sure to come.

     In the midst of the storm, it is easy to forget God's faithfulness to us, and of His promises. We forget the light during dark times.

     God does not fault us for our despair.  And, we do not know how our story ends. God does. He gives us His Word; His promises, and God uses our storms and wrecks for His purpose. When we let Him, He changes us, and our eternal destiny is upon us. Whatever the storm, with God's help, He will strengthen us. (Philippians 4:13).

     Check out the story about Joseph in the book of Genesis or of Job in the book of Job (chapter 42). It’s up to you. What the evil one meant for evil, God used for good (Genesis 50:20).

     

     

     

A MOMENT IN TIME

Everything is a moment in time, then it is gone.  And whether good or bad, the moment is logged away as a memory to be pulled out, talked about, to laugh or cry over, then stored away again.

A friend gave this sweater to me, new with tags, and trying it on, I looked in the mirror, and was taken back to a time years ago, something that made me laugh all over again.

During our first years, my husband, James, found himself looking for work, going to interviews, and learning about himself and others along the way.

One day, he was called for an interview, something very exciting because this was the 80's, a time of recession and job-scarcity.  So we decided he needed a new suit for this special occasion, and off he went to the local Sears store, where he found just the right one, brought it home, and hung it up.

Finally, it was interview day!  On went the new, gray suit and shined up shoes, and out the door to be on time and ready to impress...

After about two hours, James returned, ready to tell me about the interview so I sat down opposite him while he, standing, began telling his story in the usual way, moving around and raising his arms as he talked.  I watched while listening when suddenly I noticed something hanging from the armpit of his suit jacket, much like in the above picture.  Staring, an image came into my mind of him being interviewed, tag waving about as he answered questions, perhaps the interviewer trying not to notice, and I began to laugh, showing him the tag we forgot to snip away from the suit, price still clearly showing, and he started laughing as well.  It was a great and memorable moment in time, one we still laugh about today.

HABITS

Habits.  Something we all have in common; some worth keeping, others not. So what exactly is a habit? Because I have a 1977 edition of the New Webster's Collegiate Dictionary, I thought this would be the perfect starting point: look it up.  There are nine entries for the word "habit" in this edition -  #1 refers to clothing, #2 refers to costume, and #3 has to do with the manner of conducting oneself (closer to what I thought but not quite!) Skipping down to entry #7 finally gave me the definition I had been searching for.

     Habit:  A behavior of pattern acquired by frequent repetition or physiologic exposure that shows itself in regularity or increased facility of performance.  Part b states: a mode of behavior that has  become involuntary (such as addiction).

     It was this morning when I looked the word "habit" up; now it is after 10pm, and I've thought about my own habits.  Today, for example, when I awoke, the first thing I did was walk to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee.  It is my habit to do so, and when I'm not on time (according to my brain), I'm not so happy.  If I'm out of coffee, on go my jeans and off to Safeway for "Peets" or the drive-up (desperate move!), and I don't think of this habit as negative!

     Later on, I sat observing my dog who is pictured above. Even he has habits, each day doing the same thing:  go outside, come in, eat, drink water, then lay by the fire, go on a walk, etc.  He is so predictable!  It is his habit, dependent upon me to make it happen.

     The month of January brings with it a desire for change known as resolutions which correlates with habits. The most common are to eat healthier, get more exercise, and to save more money. I read how after the second week of beginning a change, most people forget what it is they promised to do or not do.  So, why is it so difficult to resolve to do or not do something?  Not an easy-to-answer question.  Volumes have been written on this subject, podcasts are spoken, sermons taught, classes studied, support groups created, counselling, coaches, medications, weekend retreats, etc.  Some of this has value, but... still not simple. Making daily, slow, step by step conscious decisions is hard work; there is no way around it.  Sorry.

        I'd like to believe we don't give up on ourselves, that building new habits is possible, fun, and rewarding.  Find what works for you.  For me, perks work.  I set a reachable goal, then reward myself in some way; a celebration!  I do listen to others' success stories on podcast or YouTube, I am in two support/study groups, I study, write my intentions, and am kind to myself.  When I mess up it's no big deal; I begin again.  Listening to what I tell myself is important; the mind is powerful and easily fooled by what you tell it.  Think!  Pray!  Ask for help!  We all need a little help sometimes.  And, as usual, it's up to you!